my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
