dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
