hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
