put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
