ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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