He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize