He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
