Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
