You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
The air was thick with penises
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
