Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
