Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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