i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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