According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
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