All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize