And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
