Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Michael Bay diarrhea
nutella sex= disaster
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
