is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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