brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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