so let's talk penis.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
