I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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