does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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