We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
