I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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