So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
