Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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