pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize