My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
