They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
this must be what syphilis tastes like
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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