How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
