Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
