i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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