Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Operation Purity has been aborted
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
