from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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