Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Randomize
