I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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