I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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