She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
