just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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