He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
