if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
