I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
