I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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