Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
