What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
