Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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