Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize