i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize