She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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