she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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