at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
