I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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