thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
