yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
